Your A Cactus, Naru!
by GhostRin
Summary: Mai gets drunk at a party with the team, and she compares Naru to a cactus. [One-Shot]


Naru stared at Mai in surprise "A what?"

_*FLAHSBACK* _

_Mai sipped at her drink, ignoring the burning sensation as it went down her throat. Mai of course, should have paid attention to that very obvious sign of alcohol, NOT soda._

_Groaning quietly, Mai squinted against the light. 'To bright…' Mai observed; Mai's vision began to cloud, and her thoughts began to stray. Mai won't remember this night._

_Suddenly taking a long swig of her supposed 'nonalcoholic' drink, Mai started glaring at Naru, who was sitting next to her holding his own drink._

_Taking notice, Naru turned and faced Mai; noticing the splotches of red covering his assistant's face._

_Mai suddenly leaned in close to Naru, staring at him critically as if examining him. Uncomfortable with the sudden closeness, Naru shifted away, only to find himself trapped by the couch arm. 'Dammit!'_

"_Mai…" Naru growled, warning Mai. The warning flew right by Mai. Said girl continued to stare at him, leaning heavily against Naru. Naru noticed the strong scent of alcohol practically rolling of Mai; grimacing, Naru pushed Mai off him and snatched her drink from her hands._

"_Narrruuuu~…. Give it baaaacckk…" Mai slurred as she tried, and failed, to get her drink back. Naru examined the liquid before huffing in annoyance as he recognized the liquid._

"_Takigawa, are you missing your drink?" Naru asked, calling to the monk across the room. Monk looked around, only finding a full cup of soda in place of his own drink._

"_Where did it go?" Monk exclaimed, looking around for his drink, Naru passed 'Mai's' cup to him._

"_Oh, thanks Naru. Ah, why is it almost empty?" Monk looked at Naru._

"_Narrrruuuuuuu~ Narrrrruuuuuu…" Mai interrupted, singing in a slurred voice. Monk looked at Mai in shock, before realization hit him._

"_Oh crap."_

_Naru glared at Monk as Mai suddenly grabbed Naru around his waist. Naru shifted his glared to Mai._

"_Let go Mai-"_

"_No!" Mai interrupted Naru, staring at him straight in the eye defiantly, she tightened her grip._

_Monk shifted as he tried not to laugh, gesturing frantically at the rest of the team to watch._

"_Mai." Naru growled slowly, his patience running thin._

"_You're like a cactus, Naru…." Mai suddenly slurred, releasing Naru only to waving her hand accusingly at him._

_Naru stared at Mai in shock "A what?"_

_*END OF FLASHBACK*_

"You're like a cactus!" Mai confirmed in a proud voice staring accusingly at Naru.

"Mai, you're drunk" Naru growled at her

"No I'm not" for a second a flash of lucid glinted in Mai's eyes, before it was gone again.

"Mai-"

"You're like a freakin' cactus!" Mai insisted, suddenly swooping down and stealing Naru's drink.

Grabbing at his drink, Naru watched as Mai drained it instantly before she started waving the empty glass in his face.

"Your… You're all pokey on the outside!" Mai slurred heavily, Naru lifted an eyebrow at her.

"All sharp and crap!" Mai growled at him

"Mai-" Naru tried to interrupt her again

"Lighten up! It can't kill ya" Mai suddenly slumped against Naru

"I bet past all the needles, you're like anyone elseee…." Mai's sentence trailed as her eyelids grew heavy

The rest of the team were all watching this while trying hard not to laugh as they secretly recorded everything. Lin was the one holding the camera while smirking.

"Yeah Mai! Naru _is_ like a cactus!" the monk agreed with Mai, earning himself a death glare from Naru. Mai smirked victoriously up at Naru.

"Yah see Naru! You're like a cactus!" Mai dropped off like a rock

"Takigawa, must I remind you that this is happening because you misplaced your damned drink?" Naru was seething; Monk smirked as he pointed to the cup still clutched in Mai's hand.

"But then why does Mai have _your_ cup?" Naru would have stood to strangle the monk if Mai wasn't hanging off of him.

Naru slouched against the couch. This was his worst day yet. 'A cactus, huh?' Naru sighed, being compared to a desert plant was diffidently a first.

Groaning to himself, Naru pinched the bridge of his nose. Mai shifted until her head was resting against Naru's chest, and snuggled close against him. Well, maybe not his _worst _day.

* * *

**Yeah, that just happened, I just compared Naru to a plant XD I was reading one of my medical plant books I got when I went west and I randomly made a comparison of Naru and a cactus, very sharp on the outside, but normal (and not quite what you would expect) on the inside; vulnerable even. I also can hear Mai saying "You're a cactus, Naru!" in the same voice Hagred in Harry Potter used to say "You're a wizard, Harry" XD oh lord save me I'm the one drunk, not Mai.**

**Gene: *tries not to laugh* **

**Naru: *glares at Gene* **

**Rin: *grins* Kinda makes sense when you think about it**

**Naru: How am I in anyway like a CACTUS?!**

**Rin: *smirks* Thought you were a genius, Gene gets it**

**Gene: *breaks out laughing* That was brilliant!**

**Rin: I just had an idea. Hey Mai!**

**Mai: hhhmmmmm…? (still drunk)**

**Rin: You can have the honors *hands Mai a mic***

**Mai: *takes mic* REEEVVVIIIIEEWwwww…! *slurred singing***


End file.
